For a little while I considered not sharing online that I was a part of the TV show Onderweg naar Liefde about dating vanlifers… Because it’s awesome AND it’s vulnerable!
My ego whispered: “If you don’t tell anyone, the ones that are supposed to see it will, and the others won’t.”
Ha! Clever, how my ego finds ways to speak my language to try to protect me from me.
But, protect me from what, exactly? Trolls? Shame? Comments? A big dramatic downfall or breakdown? 😜
People will judge. That’s a fact. In positive, neutral and negative ways. That’s what us humans do. Well, when we care, at least.
More importantly: I will probably judge too! Myself, first and foremost. I mean, I was there, I know what happened for a big chunk of the ride! But much like when you see a photo or video of an event, you might be surprised to see yourself, from a different angle. “Is THAT what I looked/sounded/acted like?!?” So yeah, that will probably happen, but then with lots of people looking (and judging) too. 👀
YEP, this won’t be a perfectly curated version of me. Messy me will join the adventure too. Nervous me. Excited me. Struggling me. Funny me. Serious me. Soft me. Sharp me. Empowered me. Not so empowered me. Clear me. Confused me. Witchy me. Normal me. ALL of me. And what exactly has been caught on camera, we’ll see!
But isn’t that the liberating point?! Don’t we all secretly want to be witnessed?
Loved? Accepted, EXACTLY as we are? Even, or especially when the road gets bumpy? Even, or especially when some people don’t like or love you, or what you do? I teach authentic leadership, for god sakes! I give people permission to SHINE, with ALL their colours.
And the thing is, what matters most: DO YOU LOVE YOU? Unconditionally? When you’re not in your best shape or condition? When you’re outside your comfort zone? But also… when you’re shining authentically and beautifully?
Because you know what? – Sometimes THAT’S what we’re actually scared of. To SHINE our light. Not just, the pretty toned, warm, classy, dimmed ones, but all the colours of the rainbow! I believe we (almost) ALL have a longing and a fear for it!
Joining this adventure is a little bit like exposure therapy. And I’m choosing to drink the medicine! That’s why I chose to share it. To include you on the ride. WATCH ME, if you want. No matter what you think, or don’t think. You’re lovingly invited.
I set the intention for this experience to liberate me in new ways and next levels! Because one thing I believe: WE ARE BORN TO SHINE! And remember our innate worthiness and love.
I feel proud of myself, for stretching my comfort zone once again. I feel my playground widening day by day, and it feels exciting! Liberating myself with Love. And maybe… I even found my love! Let’s go see and find out! 🤗
Are you also ready to shed the fear of judgement? I say: do something that scares you! Or live vicariously through me, by watching @onderwegnaarliefde – starting Monday on 19:25 op NPO3 or online on NPO Start. Let’s do this. Together. Freeeedom!
Vamos! 🌞
X Aukje
